Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Brandon Wegher reportedly abducted by Aliens, New Member Charles to the rescue.

J here, i know this isn't a sports blog but this is the first breaking news on the Brandon Wegher situation. It has been reported by all major media outlets today that the 5'11 210 pound running back out of Sioux City, Iowa has been missing from Iowa Hawkeyes football practice the past 2 days, without reason and no-one is commenting. Let me be the first to break the news, delivered by my top secret mildly reputable pseudo anonymous source who we will call Chuck, Brandon Wegher has reportedly been abducted by an Alien space craft and is being held at ransom while we speak. My source sent me the following pictures which confirm the story beyond a shadow of magic.

A DIGITAL PHOTO TAKEEN BY A FAN AT PRACTICE YESTERDAY
NOTICE THE DETAIL



RANSOM NOTE:
NOTICE THE GREEN SIGNATURE PROVING THAT IT IS ALIEN IN NATURE


The ransom note clearly states they have kidnapped Wegher and will not return him until their demands are met. Coach Kirk Ferentz declined to give us a quote on the situation but did say off the record it has always been his policy not to negotiate with Alien terrorists. In light of this Story New Member Charles has decided to donate all of their earnings from their show this Friday to the Brandon Wegher relief fund in hopes that they will raise enough money to buy the 2 DIGORNO pizzas the aliens are demanding, please come out and support this noble cause.

New Member Charles
live at Vaudeville Mews
Des moines Iowa
doors 9:30 Charles at 10:00 sharp
in support of
Setting Sun
Longbottom Leaf
Quitzow
5 dollar cover

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