Saturday, August 21, 2010

State Fair Maddness

We Played the fair fri august 20th 2010
We wore double popped collars
It was raining
An old man said we were too loud
my amp blew up
many of our family members showed up
a lady gave us free mac and cheese
we hope we play better at our next show

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Hump Day Moustache: Now Moustache Free!!

Howdy-doo!! Well, what an exciting week in Charles-stan. We had our awesome face-splitting RAWK show last Friday out at the Vaudeville Mews, and passed out many many mini-Slim-Jims of love. (And by 'mini-Slim-Jims of love' I mean songs of wonderment and funn and awesomeness. And also actual mini-Slim-Jims. Of love.)

On top of that, it was a record week at the blog!! By our calculations, we got between 87 and 225,000 hits last week!! Probably due to the "Brandon Whizzer got kidnapped by ET" story leading the google-pack when using the google to search for "The Iowa running back getting kidnapped by ET." See, we try to be topical here, so in an effort to try to fenagle another quarter-billion hit week: BARACK OBAMA MOSQUE COLUMBIAN JET BRETT FAVRE VAGINA

...that should do it...

Also of note:

We're getting all super-duper-ly pumped for our show at the Iowa State Fair (I Know!!) this Friday at 3pm in the Budweiser Tent. We're really planning on ramping up the action for this bit and rucking the fuck outta some bitches seems like not just some sort of veiled promise, but an actual possibility...nee, a certainty!!

Josh will be along shortly this week with your tour guide so that you won't be all like, "dude, what the fuck is this place?? I came to see New Member Charles!! I totally wasn't expecting this much horse dung!!" Fear not, J will be taking you on your own little virtual tour to get you all prepared for the cavalcade of dung-edness that is the Iowa State Fair.

Now, since it's Wednesday, here's a picture of some funny people doing something stupid:

HILLAIOUS!!

Sunday, August 15, 2010

Post Show Mews'ings

J here, first and formost we need to appologize to anyone who may have taken our Brandon Wegher story to heart as it now appears he may not have been abducted by aliens this according to the brilliant folks at Black Heart Gold Pants see article here. This means 2 things, the first ; we're not much of a sports blog, which is great news, cause we're a band and we're supposed to spend all our time punching meat and yelling at old dogs, and the second; the pizza's we were going to donate to the Wegher relief fund will now go to feed 3 hungover band members so we got some pie out of our idacy. NOTE: In the event it does still end up being an alien abduction we still stand bravely by our story and source. ONWARD!

OR IS IT?






Oh we also played a show this past Friday at Vaudeville Mews, the first in our homebase of Des Moines and we only mildly frighetened the crowd this time around in our greaser uniforms. We had a great turn out for the show and the sound was on point not to mention a prize winning Charles. Charles this time opted to sit out of playing any music and instead handed out Tobbasco flavored slim Jims to our rabid fan base in the crowd and danced a Jig to a cover of "Wave of Mutilation" by the Pixies, which was our closer. All in all was really really fun and hopfully the Mews has us back sooner than later for another evening of Ghost related fun. Oh wait picutres you ask ?? Yes we have them. How many? We actually shot 8 rolls, yes seriously 8, but all but 1 were lost in the fire, you know ...the fire. But good news we still got a whole roll of shots. Wait whats that? Oh, only one picture turned out on that roll, so correction we have "a" picture. This is Chris and shan....errr Charles in the green room before the show discussing the best way to disperse the Jims, notice the detail of clothing on both.

"Ok when we give the thumbs up, start killing baby kittens"
disclaimer: Very few kittens we're actually injured
Finally we have a show next Fri at 3 pm at The world famous Iowa State fair Budweiser Tent, just a heads up keep an eye out this week for" Tour Guide: Iowa State Fair edition" and more updates on that show.
Cheers,
j



Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Brandon Wegher reportedly abducted by Aliens, New Member Charles to the rescue.

J here, i know this isn't a sports blog but this is the first breaking news on the Brandon Wegher situation. It has been reported by all major media outlets today that the 5'11 210 pound running back out of Sioux City, Iowa has been missing from Iowa Hawkeyes football practice the past 2 days, without reason and no-one is commenting. Let me be the first to break the news, delivered by my top secret mildly reputable pseudo anonymous source who we will call Chuck, Brandon Wegher has reportedly been abducted by an Alien space craft and is being held at ransom while we speak. My source sent me the following pictures which confirm the story beyond a shadow of magic.

A DIGITAL PHOTO TAKEEN BY A FAN AT PRACTICE YESTERDAY
NOTICE THE DETAIL



RANSOM NOTE:
NOTICE THE GREEN SIGNATURE PROVING THAT IT IS ALIEN IN NATURE


The ransom note clearly states they have kidnapped Wegher and will not return him until their demands are met. Coach Kirk Ferentz declined to give us a quote on the situation but did say off the record it has always been his policy not to negotiate with Alien terrorists. In light of this Story New Member Charles has decided to donate all of their earnings from their show this Friday to the Brandon Wegher relief fund in hopes that they will raise enough money to buy the 2 DIGORNO pizzas the aliens are demanding, please come out and support this noble cause.

New Member Charles
live at Vaudeville Mews
Des moines Iowa
doors 9:30 Charles at 10:00 sharp
in support of
Setting Sun
Longbottom Leaf
Quitzow
5 dollar cover

Monday, August 2, 2010

Paris

New video up enjoy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Hump Day Moustache: High School Reunion Edition

So, I went to my High School Reunion last weekend. When I got there, I realized that I knew everybody there...and was friends with not a single one of them. Then it dawned on me that my only friend in HS was an immaginary monkey I named ChimChim. We were great friends until one day he refused to have a catch with me. He said he could never respect a man who's hero was a criminal (My hero is Fiona Apple). Also, I think he was kind of pissed that I kept calling him ChimChim, what with him being an Orangutan and not a Chimpanzee, and all...

Anyway...where was I?? OH!! Yes, the HS Reunion. Well, despite all of the face-to-face marketing that I did on behalf of the Good Ship Charles, I believe that if I were to calculate how many in attendance were reading this right now, I would probably be dissapointed, which might have more to do with the two gallons of Gin I drank and the half-dozen asses I uninvited-ly groped than a failure on my end to explicate the awesome-ness of New Member Charles.

Still, if any of you made it:

WELCOME: IPALOOK, AK HIGH SCHOOL CLASS OF 1978 TO THE NEW MEMBER CHARLES WEBSITE OF FUNN AND AWESOMENESS!!

Now here's a Moustache for you!!

EVER