Friday, May 28, 2010

So, This Guy Died Today

What, Me Worry??
That was his catch phrase, right??

Josh and the Magic Persia sword

Hi, Josh here, Praise be to Charles. As you all already know its only a few weeks till Charles's birthday and as of late i have had a mild gut hernia as to what to give the semi transparent Mozart. Well my search has ended, I was watching the Trailer for the new Prince of Persia movie staring Donnie Darko, which i have already decided i am going to give 5 stars, and there it was .....a magic time sword! Not only does Donnie Darko wield it with cat like precision but it would be great for shows too, dont believe me, check out scenario below.

-

-Pictured,
Donnie Darko in an add for Juvenile Diabetes

Script-

fade in- interior day-
NMC playing a show at some rad venue

Chris: dammit Dan you forgot to hit the drum on that part of the song

Dan: You're mean

Charles: (raises sword) Zarnit forgtom molji (
Donnie Darko Sword activates the sands of time)

Josh: wow we're on a sandy dune and there's lava everwhere just like the trailer for
Prince of Persia

Fade out

Get my point? Not only that but great bands of the past have had swords too. The best example being
Naughty by Nature.



Trech, the front man with a magnetic personality, wielded a persian sword named Ali Baba, look how good they turned out. Pretty sure you've heard OPP....pretty sure you liked it too! Stage effects, 3 extra hit points on song writing ability and makes us look like
Donnie Darko...wheres the problem you ask? The problem is where the hell do you find a magical sword at a reasonable price in this economy? Oh opps, done, you find it at Swords of Might, but NMC listener out there, i know you.... your saying this is a replica.... it prolly cant even conjure demons. Yup it is, but it can do all of the above if you have a sorcerer curse it, and Dan, while good at drums, is an even better sorcerer. Problem solved, we all save a few bucks and dont even have to go on a desert chase to find the damn thing.We can drink whisky and hot sauce till the UPS guy brings it to our door. Cant wait to see Chuck open it!

TOODLES

J

UPDATE
: Since posting this the
Maggie Gillenhal sword on Swords of Might has now gone into backorder due to excitement for the Persian movie , having second thoughts about seeing this movie...didnt think so...neither is Charles!

Thursday, May 27, 2010

New Member Sammy??


Yay! Congress has decided to drop all charges against Sir Sammy Sosa. Sosa, who used to appear only in disguise, has now revealed his true "colors" and has announced that he is a distant cousin of our very own new member, Charles. Rumor has it that once Sammy dropped the charade and embraced his inner Charles, Charles rewarded him by calling his connections in congress to have the inquiry dropped.

New Member Charles guitar stings food music ghosts haunted josh kaufman chris lachky dan tripp future beer stickers cd shirt iowa des moines alternative fast drums earth sunsine fun cool bass cutie cats smurfs

Monday, May 24, 2010

New Logo!!

Hey, look at Charles acting all cool and letting the bottom of his ghost-pants be the "M" on the new logo that Chris made:
Frown is not from logo...Chris' pasta was undercooked

Charles is having a good ole time of spookin' people, posing for logos, and eating the band's leftover pasta, but that still doesn't excuse him from texting Josh last night, and letting him know the secret of the final episode of LOST before Josh had a chance to watch it. I mean, who woulda thunk that Jack was really HITLER the entire time!! I mean, WOW. Talk about your all-time cliffhangers!!

At least it didn't end up that they were all really dead, or something stupid. That would have really ruined it

Saturday, May 22, 2010

Security Check

Here's what happens when you end rehearsal. You hop in your awesomely, and conveniently spaced Honda Element, push play on the iPod, and start jamming out hardcore to Y Control by the Yeah Yeah Yeahs.

Santa hats and misspellings will not stop us from rocking your face

OOPS!! 'Cause then Josh calls you and is all like, "shit, did you lock the door of the rehearsal space," and I'm all like, "umm."

But!! Because he calls, you have to turn down Y Control which is not good because 1.) you can't listen to Y Control anymore, and 2.) there are three high-schoolers walking down the street next to you, and how the hell are they supposed to know how cool you are if they can't realize how hard you rock??

I imagine if Josh had not called for a security check, my conversation with the young ruffians would have gone thusly:

ME: [nods knowingly at punk rockers]

PUNK ROCK KID 1: Who is that??


ME: It's The Yeah Yeah Yeahs


PUNK ROCK KID 2: Never heard of them

ME: Oh, so I guess you're more of the NOFX type punk rockers then??

PUNK ROCK KID 1: Who the fuck is NOFX??


ME: How old are you??


PUNK ROCK KID 2: My dad lets me borrow his credit card to go to the mall.


ME: [drives over punk rockers with my awesomely, and conveniently spaced Honda Element]


Thanks for keeping me out of jail Josh!! You're the best!!

Friday, May 21, 2010

A Welcome Message From New Member Charles

Hi!! Welcome to New Member Charles. We're a band. We live in Iowa. That's about it.

Oh!! And we like to have fun, too!! I know that there are many of you out there who are asking some very important questions regarding New Member Charles. Well, questions are a good way of getting to know things. What things you ask?? (see?? Question!!) Well, how about the following:

Who Are You Guys??

We are Dan, Josh and Chris.

Who is Charles??

Charles is the ghost who lives in our rehearsal space and plays the Giovanni keyboard. Duh. If that wasn't obvious enough. He is on our logo. He is also our confidant, loyal friend, and with the right amount of encouragement, might just cure cancer one day. That boy could grow up to be the president!!

What do you guys sound like??

This is the part of the conversation where I say, "Well, who's your favorite musician/band??" and you respond, "Peabo Bryson!!" and I say, "Holy Shit!! We sound just like Peabo Bryson!!" and then you say, "Fuck you. No you don't" and then one of us ends up getting punched in the cock. Well, being that neither of us want to go down that road...

Instead of explaining what New Member Charles sounds like, I'd rather explain what New Member Charles feels like. You ever break your fucking arm??

Kind of like that...but not really.

Where do you guys play??

Wherever dreams are made. Also, in Des Moines, IA.

Why does the taste of pennies remind you of losing a tooth??

My teeth are made of pennies.